Charity Bash

So last night was the big event. We've been planning it since July and it's basically taken over my life for the past 2 weeks. And guess what -- it was a HUGE success! We actually hit capactiy at the bar (720) and raised well over 7000 dollars for hurricane relief, about 4000 of which will hopefully be matched by Harvard (which would give us a total of over 11,000!). Of course the night was not without its problems. The bar was horribly understaffed and I waited half an hour at the bar trying to get a drink (needless to say, it was the only one I got all night!). It was also ridiculously crowded so that when I went to try to find my friends, I couldn't. So I worked the door most of the night but that was ok, hanging out with other board members.
I'm just so happy that a) it's over and b) it was a success. Now I can get back to the important things in life, like tv (I've missed Gilmore Girls and the OC for the past 2 weeks!), sleep, and oh yeah, that thing called homework...

I am not Superwoman

I'd like to be Superwoman. I'd like to be able to do everything and do it all to everyone's liking. But I just can't. This charity bash planning is really wearing on me -- thank god the event is tomorrow! It's going to be a great event -- an all Boston-area grad school party to raise money for Katrina relief. All donations ($10 minimum) will go to charity b/c HL Central and Gypsy Bar are covering the cost of the party and offering no cover and free drink tickets. But planning is making me crazy. I'm not even supposed to be doing all of the planning but the person who is in charge of it is interviewing and otherwise too busy. Anyway, first I've been trying to coordinate advance "ticket sales" (they aren't ticket sales, but whatever) during lunch hours and people haven't been showing up for their shifts which means I have to cover them. Then, I'm trying to coordinate people sitting at the door during the event and handling donations there. Everyone is driving me crazy. I sent out 2 emails last week asking people for their time preferences -- 2 people (out of 12) responded. And now that it's all set, and especially the early hours are set in stone because they're the people who actually responded, no one will take the end of the party. Well I'll be home and in bed by then so I'll be damned if I'm going to do it but someone has to. Last year's board would have stepped up and done it -- it's what we're paid to do -- but this year's board is really lacking in that dedication. I hate being a bitch. I hate that people already don't like me and that my telling them, sorry but you'll have to sit at the door from 11-12 (which isn't even the late shift) is going to make them dislike me more, but I really don't have a choice. I just want tomorrow to be over!

Phew. Sorry for the vent but I really needed it.

Who knew?

So who knew that I could actually have fun in law school without being too drunk to remember it the next day (ok, so that only happened once, but still). Today was the 3L "class trip" to Cape Cod. Wasn't going to go because I don't really like my classmates but two friends, Emily and Silpa, talked me into going with them and it was actually a lot of fun. We didn't exactly do much, ate, wandered around kitchy stores, and sat on the beach(it was 60 degrees, not quite beach weather) but it was fun all the same. While on the beach we gossiped about all of our section-mates from 1L year and it was pretty funny. Also managed to get sand everywhere but oh well, a shower should cure that. I'll post pics soon.

Apologies to all

I want to apologize to everyone I've snapped at during the past week (yes, that's all of you phantom readers out there :) ). I've been in a deplorable funk and have taken it out on everyone and anyone. I'm sorry if I've snapped at you, complained to you, or otherwise slighted you. I've been unhappy with myself, with my life, and I've taken it out on everyone else instead of focusing on a solution. Again, apologies and I hope to feel and be better soon.

Barack Obama

Today I happened upon the immense good fortune of the opportunity to see (and hear) Sen. Barack Obama. He was speaking at the HLS Black Alumni function and I stood outside the tent where he was speaking and listened. WOW!! He is amazing. He is brilliant and defies all political stereotypes. It's like he articulates so beautifully what I feel about the general situation of the world. And it's not politics -- in fact it's so distinctly apolitical. At a time when blaming the president or the republican party would be so easy, and so many people are doing it, Obama speaks not of blame but of responsibility. It doesn't matter whose fault the inadequate response to Katrina was, rather what's important is that we ALL take responsibility for fixing it and making sure that nothing like that happens again.

Another part of his philosophy that really grabs me and resonates with me is the crucial distinction he draws between seeing problems and answers as an either/or issue or a both/and issue, particularly his choice of the latter. Take, for example, the problems stemming with public schools. With the either/or attitude, people would say that either the problem was with the government not giving enough money for schools or the general societal ills of a lack of support for education within families and communities. However, the both/and attitude recognizes that the problem stems both from governmental failure to provide money and support and cultural barriers to getting children to appreciate the value of an education. The only effective solutions can come from people who recognize this both/and attitude.

The importance of a holistic view is so undervalued and underrecognized in politics today. People are so busy taking sides that they don't pay enough attention to what they're actually saying. I applaud Barack for separating from the pack and doing what no one else is willing to do -- admit that he doesn't have all of the answers and that he can't do it without the people who see the other sides.

If only more of our national and world leaders were more like Barack Obama, I think we would live in a very different world.

In the market for a life

I need a life. OK, obviously I'm alive but that's not what I mean. I need something to do. A purpose. Law school is not a life. It's a means to a certain end but if I view law school as my life, then that means that once I graduate my job will be my life and that's not what I want. I need something beyond this -- something meaningful. There's a lot that's meaningful to me, important to me, but none of it is "my life." My friends are not my life. My family is not my life. There are a lot of causes that are important to me, but none of them are "my life" either.
I feel very lost without any purpose more meaningful than just continuing down this path toward something that I refuse to let be my life purpose. I want a life more meaningful than my school, my job. But how do I get there? Where do I even start?

new beginnings

I thought it might be time for a change and, frankly, I like this program/host better than livejournal (or at least I think I do from reading many other people's blogs on here).

About the new name: everyone has an inner monolouge (or dialouge) that goes through their head constantly (at least I hope they do, otherwise I'm quite the freak!). In my postings, I want to let some of that inner voice come out and be heard.

I'll try not to post mundane details about my days because, frankly, I'm not very exciting but if something exciting happens, I'm sure I'll mention it.

So, a new school year, a new blog... here's to new beginnings!