Dear New J. Crew Pants,

I must say I'm impressed.  I managed to spill on you twice in about a minute (first time was sauce, second time was coke zero) and when I just looked down at my lap not 5 minutes later, the spots are gone!  This is fantastic, as the second spill made it look more than a little like I'd had an accident.  I was sitting here contemplating how I was going to leave my office again today with such an embarrassing spot when, lo and behold, it was already gone!  No more worries :) Well, at least about that...

Thanks!

me

Dear Desk,

I wish you would organize yourself.  I don't have time to be organizing all the time (plus it's not exactly one of my strong suits) and usually that's ok, but right now, you're covered in so many papers that I can't find anything I'm looking for and it's making me a little crazy.  Part of the problem, of course, is that these documents are too large to be contained by even the largest binder clips, which also means they don't fit in my file for the matter.  But they've gotta go somewhere, in some sort of organized fashion, and I wish you could just do that instead of me having to take the time and effort to do it.  Wouldn't that be best?

Wishfully,

me

 

Dear Beach,

You were fantastic.  I LOVED playing in the ocean.  And as much as I do love Lake Michigan, if I'm being totally honest, it really doesn't compare to the ocean.  However, I do NOT love the sunburn that I now have.  I cannot sit back and I have not slept in a long time.  Also I cannot wear regular shoes.  Why do you do this to me?  I wear sunscreen, I follow the instructions, and still, this!!??!!  Not ok.  I will be back to one of your relatives someday (in January if not sooner) and I would really really appreciate it if you didn't thank me like this next time.  Is it a deal?

Thanks,

me