Dear Barbecue Tools,

Let me just tell you that I really do not appreciate that you all cascaded out of my parents' pantry and landed on my head this morning.  It really hurt and it left a nasty lump on my forehead that will probably also turn into a nasty bruise.  And you did not help me in my quest to get out of the house by 6 AM (ok, so I was only 3 minutes late on that, but still!).    That said, I do appreciate that the damage you left wasn't any worse than it was... I mean, some of you were sharp and could have cut me badly but you didn't.  No blood was drawn.   Additionally, at least the lump is covered by where I generally wear my hair so it's not visible... So thanks I guess. But mostly, I'm pretty unhappy that you fell on me at all.    Because my morning would have been a whole lot better without that experience.

No love,

me