Disappointment

There isn't much that happens in my life that a good burrito bowl from Chipotle (or, Qdoba when the nearest Chipotle is hundreds of miles away) and some retail therapy can't cure. So why don't I feel any better?
Long story short: my brother is at home for the next month. This alone isn't a huge issue. It's the why and the how it affects me. Let's just say that the why isn't a very good reason and that I'm disappointed in him, which in itself surprises me because I wasn't aware that I had any expectations or standards when it came to my brother. I guess I was wrong, apparently I do. More frustrating to me, though, is that he'll be there when I'm there and we don't do well when we're under the same roof. I was really looking forward to going home in three weeks and just spending some quality time with my parents before heading to Cali to visit Sarah and my family out there but apparently I get to spend quality time with my brother too. I'm not going to let this ruin my vacation, but it's certainly had an impact in how much I was looking forward to it.
I just hate who I am when he's around. We get along fine when we're on opposite sides of the country, but put us in the same house and it's like we become 5 years old again -- jealous, petty, and obnoxious. But when I try to control it and be the bigger person, I just build up so much anger that the result really isn't any better. I don't want to be this way -- it drives me crazy to see myself turn into this. And really, this is so selfish of me to be angry with him for being home because it will ruin my time. There are a million better reasons to be angry, upset, disappointed, whatever but this is the one that I feel. And I hate that too. Ugh, this is so complicated, no wonder the Qdoba and new gym clothes I bought didn't help... Obviously this was too big of a problem for Qdoba -- needed the real deal (chipotle)... *sigh*
I'm going out tonight and I don't like to drink when I'm upset -- it's a recipe for disaster -- but I'm going to try not to let this stand in my way of having a good night.